You ever have something keep showing up for you repeatedly, yet completely miss it?
Yeah, that’s been my relationship with peacocks. I realized recently that peacock might have a message for me. I laughed as I thought of the peacock earrings I’ve been wearing daily for probably a year or more, the peacock Halloween costume I have worn several times over the last 7 years. The long skirt I had gotten even before that costume that looked like peacock feathers. Among many other times I reflected that peacock has made an appearance in my life! And as I was laughing with one of my best friends about it recently, I looked up and saw this tiny Polaroid of a peacock I’ve had on my mantel since my friend, Avi, gave it to me last year! Not only that, but they just. keep. appearing.
It’s funny because I was once told that one of my spirit guides is Quan Yin. I have been seeing that name pop up a lot lately and now I see that the peacock has been associated with her.
I have been guided, over the last several years especially, to lead with my heart and show up fully without regards to what people will think of me. I know that when we give ourselves permission to step fully into our power as bright explosions of ourselves, we give others the permission to do the same. Authenticity is a KEY to getting into alignment with our own spirit, and alignment is KEY to experiencing all the magic that life has to offer!
Peacocks don’t give a shit. They’re confident in themselves regardless of what’s going on around them. They are fearless in their expression. They don’t hide their true colors, they flaunt them. And they definitely don’t hold back their truth for fear of what others will think of them. Not everyone is going to like their bright feathers, and they’re OK with that. They don’t need anyone else to like or understand them, because they like and understand themselves and they’re just doing them. I have been learning to do the same. The peacock moves through the world just doing what peacocks do. They don’t doubt, they don’t question, they don’t hold back. Peacocks trust. They know they’re going to find their path/mate/tribe as long as they keep showing up just as they are. They know that the things/other peacocks meant for them will be drawn to them like a magnet. It’s what they experience over and over again. Show their full beauty and attract all that they desire. Wow, such wise beings, right?!
I have never been as confident in myself as I am right now. I was building it and gained so much confidence following my training in Holographic Kinetics. It was a noticeable shift right away. It feels electric and grounding simultaneously. I feel myself stepping more into my power all the time. Learning to fully recognize and embody the energy of my spirit while setting healthy energetic boundaries for myself. Working with and feeling my shift internally, cocooning to integrate the lessons and allow myself to adjust myself to the new levels of energy, and then seeing the shift in my outer world. My word for 2020 is empowered. I can see that peacock has been sharing its flamboyant energy with me to help propel me into my full empowerment. Thank you, peacock.
I am very synced with animals and find that I’ve had so many beautiful animal messengers land on my path throughout my lifetime. The animals shift as I move along my path. They always carry the message I need at the time. Jellyfish is my spirit animal, but I am so grateful for all ofanimals who have touched my life.
What animal(s) hold messages for you? Do you know what your spirit animal is? Is there a repeating animal showing up for you right now?
Thank you for reading along. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG or FB for more inspiring content. Sending you all so much love!
After all of the years that have run their course since Shel Silverstein wrote this, isn’t it still so powerful? To me, it represents how we often move through the world hidden behind masks of conformity, unable to connect to the people who radiate the energy and qualities we most seek through connection. How do we get to a place of showing up most authentically in our lives? What allows us to finally drop the masks we’ve been holding up, so that we can find our tribe, our partner, and OURSELVES?
We are born beautiful bundles of light wrapped in adorable little suits complete with the biggest eyes and tiniest toes. Open, present, and connected to the Source that we are. I’ve seen many babies born and have had the pleasure in caring for them immediately after birth. Have you ever felt the energy of a new baby? Their energy shifts the entire room. People laugh, cry, shake, clap, hug, scream, beam, and delight simply because of the presence of a newborn baby. Yes, of course part of that is because of the excitement the family has for this little one, but as everything is energy, there’s so much more to it than than the purely human/physical experience of it. In witnessing birth, we are literally witnessing a portal open up from the spiritual to the physical as a mother ushers new life into the world. How truly amazing is this life? Women are the connection between the spiritual and physical planes.
Because of the work I do in Holographic Kinetics, I have come to know that the spark of a new spirit enters its earthly form at the time of conception inside the mother’s womb. From that moment on, as holograms of our mothers, we become observers to her entire experience. Our mother’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences feel like our own as we are so intimately connected. Even at that stage of our development, we can take on beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and life that will continue to shape our realities throughout this lifetime and sometimes beyond.
Little children do not conform. They want to wear rain boots when it’s dry, sunny and 110 degrees out, they want to wear mismatched, colorful clothes, they want to sing and dance wherever they find themselves. But then, they get sent to school and around 4th grade/9 years old, they notice that other people are paying attention to them and what they’re doing, saying, and what they’re wearing. They’re noticing the same about others. And their whole world shifts. Rather than being completely free, they become easily embarrassed. They move away from their free-spirited nature, and towards what everyone else seems to expect from them. At this point, they might put on a mask to conceal their true nature. And their light dims.
As teenagers, the judgements grow as do the comparisons to each other. With social media booming, people are exposed to, and are therefore able to compare themselves to more people than ever before in humankind history. But it’s a false comparison when we pit our insides against anyone’s outsides, especially the outsides that are neatly displayed on social media. Nevertheless, all of the comparison quickly steals joy. Teens can start feeling lonely and isolated during this time, because many are not connected real person to real person, but rather masked person to masked person. They question how anyone can love them, since they know, even if only deep down, that no one REALLY knows them. And their light dims even more.
For those people blessed enough to make it out of their teens and into adulthood, they often find themselves checking off the “requirements” of adulthood as deemed appropriate by society, their parents, and their peers. College, job to pay for college, material possessions, a house large enough to store the material possessions, marriage to another masked individual with much to be revealed once the papers are signed, the debts are incurred. Passion takes a backseat to responsibility. Feeling further separated from their own inner guidance system, their own spirit and truth, their light dims more.
Clearly, I’m speaking generally. Not everyone masked themselves as children. Not everyone felt the need to conform to the rules. But the reality is that many have felt those pressures and can relate to what I am writing.
So then, how do we break free from that life-long programming that has us worrying so much about what other people think of us and what we “should” be doing that we allow our own light to be dimmed? I think for many of us, we hit a breaking point. A time when our mind, body, and/or spirit simply can’t take it anymore. The exhaustion and stress of holding up the weight of everyone else’s expectations, and misaligned expectations that we have placed on ourselves opens us up to dis-ease, breakdown, crisis, and/or collapse. Mine was dis-ease that turned into Lyme disease that attacked my heart. After years of not following my own heart and inner guidance, my physical heart nearly stopped beating. Did I recognize this beautiful metaphor as I was living through it? Absolutely not. Did I need to recognize it for the medical emergency I experienced to lead me down a road to completely shift myself and my life? No! Believe me, I was backed into a very tight corner eventually and the state of my health FORCED me to change my life.
But, I want you, the reader, to know that you don’t have to wait until body/mind/spirit pushes back and your heart nearly fails or you get into a serious car accident to change how you’re moving through the world. You can choose to listen to and follow your own spirit’s guidance now. You can make a conscious decision today to take steps towards a new reality. A reality with less rigid rules to follow, more joy, more freedom of expression, and most importantly, more alignment with your own spirit.
5 Important Reasons to Stop Fitting In:
1. Conformity squashes our spirit. You were born to be YOU!! Not your sister, brother, Mother, Father, or friend. When we’re constantly trying to fit in, we will constantly feel tired and rejected. We are, after all, rejecting ourselves by behaving this way. We have to start accepting ourselves fully and internalizing the fact that we were born to SHINE, not fit it!
2. Your vibe attracts your tribe. So if you’re showing up inauthentically in your life, you’re going to have a sense of not belonging to the groups you find yourself socializing in. Your connections will feel very surface level, because you, yourself, are staying surface level with what you reveal about yourself to others. It’s only when we expose our own depth that others will reflect that back to us and we’ll find ourselves having more meaningful connections and conversations. You can’t find your people while wearing a mask. How will they find you if you just look and act like everyone else??!
3. Authenticity is one of the most important ways to align with our own spirits and reach new levels of freedom. If we want to feel fulfilled. If you want a life of freedom, joy, and love, the best way I’ve found is to connect in with our own inner guidance system/our spirit and live from that place. If everyone showed up authentically in this world, I truly believe that there would be no gap in finding the solution to every problem. Our energetic vibrations are unique and fill a very specific need on our planet. Alignment with my spirit has led me to amazing people and opportunities. Alignment can look and feel like magic.
4. Our purpose in life is who we are, NOT what we do. As we move through the world as uniquely ourselves, we help create positive change. When we prioritize our own alignment and live with passion, freedom, and joy, our experience and elevated energy ripples out and positively affects the collective. In alignment, I’ve found that I still feel called to help people, but the difference is that I now realize that I don’t have to DO anything specific to make that so. In alignment, the things we say in conversation give people just the right insights at the right time, and we can be the catalyst for downloads of remembrance for people.
5. Following our joy and passions is a requirement, not a luxury if we want to lead more fulfilling lives. When people follow what they think they “should” do for money, fame, or to please their own parents, they often ignore their own inner guidance system (intuition/spirit) and end up feeling depleted. If you want to feel better, you’ve got to start doing more things that light you up! What made you feel most alive when you were a kid? What passions have you forgotten that you had? What part of you have you been neglecting? Our passions are a direct link to our spirit. Follow them into alignment and you’ll be rewarded with increased synchronicities that guide you towards people, situations, and opportunities that are for your highest good.
I am so grateful for the shifts that are happening on this planet. So many have come here to question and push against the status quo. There are so many beautiful spirits here who are living their truth and making it a priority to remain aligned with their own spirit. When we show up authentically, we give permission for others to do the same. When asked what love means to me recently, I answered something like: love means holding space so that a person feels comfortable being their authentic self. It’s what came out when prompted with little time to think about it. But seriously, if all we do in this life is love people into their own best version, we will have done a LOT to shift the state of this planet. Think about it: we give the people in our lives unconditional love which to me means holding space for their authenticity…authenticity is key to alignment with our own spirits…and alignment with our own spirits is what leads us to living our best lives full of more freedom, joy, love, and fulfillment!
I hope this post inspires you to take a step towards connecting with your own spirit, while disconnecting from the conformist program. I don’t know about you, but I never wanted to live a shallow life. I’ve always craved more juicy depth and meaning in my connections. We get to decide how we show up, therefore we get to decide what reality we experience. Show up as your true, raw, authentic, and vulnerable self, and you will attract everything you seek like a magnet.
“Driftin’” by Matisyahu
“Expansive soul with my wings in the air Try to fit a circle in the square All this talk about my look, who cares Shallow minds just got to surface”
I used to buy notebooks and journals all the time, and never write in them. Then, in about 2015, I started filling them and I haven’t stopped. The words just keep pouring out of me. During the times in my life when I lost my voice and gave my power away to other people and other things outside of myself, I withheld my creative expression. Now, it’s as if the floodgates have opened!
I remember times in my life when my energy overwhelmed the people I was closest to in my life. I remember times of having my words and actions questioned to the point of causing me to retreat deep inside of myself, because I felt “wrong” in every way I was trying to show up in the world. I remember the numerous times when people said I talked too much. You know, when you’re as sensitive as I am, you’re hearing people’s words and sensing what they’re thinking and feeling about you.
I am so happy that I have taken the time to get really confident in myself to the point of not caring if someone doesn’t like the way I’m showing up. I know that my energy attracts my tribe and I see how the people and situations in my life have shifted accordingly. I am happy that I have cultivated my communication over the years, because it’s extremely important for my purpose and the work I do. Communication is key to my favorite — connection. I’m so glad that through the course of my lifetime, I have taken classes, and have been in situations that required me to write a LOT. Again, all important for my purpose.
On May 31, 2018, after leaving my last shift as an RN in the hospital, I wrote: “I have chosen to follow my intuition, the synchronicities, and the urgings of my spirit and step onto a mostly invisible path. And I’ve never felt more at peace or more confident in my decisions as I do right now. I turn 39 tomorrow and fly around the world to a place I have dreamed of going since I was 18 — AUSTRALIA! It has taken me the better part of 39 years to get to this place. Today, I feel like I walked to the edge of a tall, spiring cliff, arms raised up like wings in the air, and jumped off into the great unknown with a confidence I didn’t have 3 years ago.”
Show up! Take risks! Live large!
I could have never seen the changes that would happen in my life from the ones I made back in 2018. My life looks nothing like I thought it would. I’m doing things for work now that didn’t even know existed back then! My personal sessions of Holographic Kinetics have only added to my confidence. One of the issues I cleared isn’t one I knew I had – feeling like there was something wrong with me. I had been carrying that around with me since my 20’s. It has been an experiment of sorts to clear issues like this one through Holographic Kinetics and then wait and see how it shifts my life. It’s hard to pinpoint the individual shifts and what issue’s release led to them, but I do know that I just feel so much more confident and comfortable in my own skin, and so much more trusting in my journey.
If you’re interested in having a Holographic Kinetics session with me, email me at email@example.com for more information. This week, I have openings on Thursday morning, Friday evening, and Saturday. I usually have availability on Tuesday and Thursday mornings and Saturday and Sunday. I schedule within the week we’re in. You can also visit http://www.holographickinetics.com for more information.
Thank you so much for reading. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG and FB for more inspiring content. Sending you all lots of love!
My current song obsession can be heard HERE. It’s Nahko and Medicine for the People’s “Aloha Ke Akua”. And the even more fitting song, “Confidence” by Matisyahu HERE.
When you open my chest on the autopsy table you will find the silver lining around my scarred heart marking the illness I overcame.
You will find a turquoise sea of love that I experienced throughout my lifetime.
Lust for places I traveled to and fell in love with, and all of the places that were always on my list for a future time.
You will find images of my son tucked away — saving them like photographs in an old static-cling photo album we always had when I was a kid.
You will find the joy that filled my days after the needle that removed the serosanguineous fluid from around my heart gave me a second chance at life — true, fully alive life.
You will find parts of every person I have connected with, every moment in nature I’ve spent, and every adventure I have ever had.
Body decaying, spirit gone on to the next life to live and love again through another suit with its own bones and flesh and organs.
A chest open with remnants remaining with the spark of my spirit on to the next time and place.
When you open my chest on the autopsy table, you won’t find me.
I am boundless and ever-evolving.
I’ll be back among the stars.
Energy swirling around the cosmos connecting back in with the Source that I AM.
When my body died, my spirit lept out and became everything that it always was — INFINITE.
I wrote this in a spoken word workshop I participated in this past weekend. We all had to include the same 5 words (I accidentally left one of them out) with the same opening line. We wrote for 10 minutes. This is what came of it. I hadn’t really thought about what I had written until I stood in front of the group to read it. Reading it out loud moved me to tears. It made me realize how even with everything I’ve been through, life is so very beautiful.
When I do leave this body, I want the people who love me to internalize this message. Read this at a party on the beach around a bonfire while people drum, dance, and celebrate! Toss my cremated remains into the sea and move on with gratitude for any moments you shared with me. We are far more than the meat suits we’re currently wearing. Life would not be so sweet without death. We are all infinite spiritual beings having a human experience.
Thank you for being here. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG or FB for more inspiring content. Sending you all so much love!
Dancing has never just been about dancing. The indigenous people around the globe know it. The church has known it (which is why some have tried to stop it from happening in the past). There is a true freedom that arises when we dance. A pure joy that emanates from the spiritual beings that we are. A swirling and igniting of energies that ripple out from our own field and connect with the earth, the spirits of everything in nature, and each other. Expressing ourselves fully through free-form movement and dance can change the world!
I have found that being authentic, following my joy, and following my intuition (guidance from my own spirit) has led to my alignment with my own spirit. Alignment is the KEY to everything we seek! Well-being of body, mind, and spirit, inner peace and a sense of fulfillment, happiness, love, freedom, and abundance. Our alignment holds the answers for all of the questions we seek answers to in regards to the meaning of our life and our purpose this go around.
When we dance, we tap into our true nature. We can set intentions when we dance to create and send love out into the universe. By doing so, we extend even more positive energy out into the world from living our joy and dancing!
Dance more! Shine your light! Your energy ripples out into the world and affects everyone and everything. Be mindful of the kinds of ripples you’re creating. Follow your joy! Allow yourself to thrive! DANCE ALIGN ELEVATE THRIVE!
I’m on a cloud today after speaking at Visalia Talks & Wine last night about “Healing Depression with Mindfulness and Holographic Kinetics”. I shared some deep parts of my personal experiences with depression and suicide. Stay tuned, because I’ll be posting the video of it when it’s ready! I know it was the first of many such opportunities and I’m so excited!! Thank you to @kelseylowshow for creating the event and being so dang amazing and for everyone who took the time to come to the event and connect with me afterwards! I am so grateful!
Thank you so much for reading along! If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG or FB for more inspirational content. Sending you so much love!
“The light within each of us fears nothing, accepts everything, and sees the value of it all as a means for deeper growth and healing. Trust in your light. It will make sense of your darkness.” — by Scott Stabile “just love.”
I recently had a new college graduate reach out to me for some advice. At the end of the conversation, I realized that what I had shared could potentially help a lot of people. So, I’ve decided to post it here. Conversations like this one light me up and keep me going. It is my intention to simply direct people back to themselves, to their own inner knowing, and to alignment with their own spirits. Always trust in your light!
I realize the power of my perspective to help shift people into a new level of awareness. But, I am acutely aware that all knowledge and wisdom lies in the person themselves. As spiritual beings having a human experience, we each have the answers that we seek within us. We hold the keys to what is holding us back and the keys to our own healing. We hold the key to our next steps along our path. We just have to quiet our minds and really listen to the whispers of our own spirit. Life is about living as the main character in our own show without allowing the loud roar of voices from our families, society, and even our own egos distract us from following our own inner guidance system. You came here to be exactly YOU!
Just the fact that you’re here, on this planet is enough for you to deserve everything your heart desires, because only you hold your exact energetic frequency. You vibrate higher when you show up authentically and unapologetically YOURSELF while you follow your joy and live your life to the fullest, whatever that looks like for YOU! (not me or your parents or your teachers or society.) Just because things have been a certain way for a lot of years doesn’t mean anything other than humans may have gotten into a bit of a rut. We are in great need of some movers and shakers to help change it up. So, instead of worrying about how to manage your anxiety as you bend and fold yourself to fit into an existing box that you’re terrified of getting stuck in, align with your own spirit, and stay the hell away from any box or any person trying to fit you into one! (or at least don’t ask for or take advice from those people). Run and be free and forge your own path! It’s 2020, it’s time to get clear on the vision you want for your own life.
College Graduate: “Hi, I just saw your IG tv video on why the govt wants to control indigenous people and agree with you completely. However, this makes me look at my own life and I feel so trapped. I’m about to graduate college and have been putting off applying to jobs just because I don’t want to be a slave. I want to break free but it goes against everything and I feel so lost. I want to live freely and in alignment but my poverty mindset & trauma seems to stop me. Do you have any words of advice?“
Me: “Wow thanks for reaching out to me! I hear you. I see you. And I appreciate you.
If you’re feeling like you don’t want to apply to jobs right now, then my advice? Don’t apply to jobs. You JUST graduated. There’s no real hurry to jump into something you’re not going to feel passionate about. I just went to a powerful intention setting ceremony today and it was powerful.
Sit quietly with your eyes closed, clear your mind and ask: what is God’s (my own spirit is what I asked, universe etc) highest vision for my life in 2020?
For me a word came into mind almost instantly. See what comes up for you. And then listen to it and take a step towards it.
I am a practitioner of Holographic Kinetics, a powerful healing modality based on Dreamtime Healing of the aboriginal people of Australia and I personally highly recommend it for clearing a poverty mindset and childhood trauma. It’s been so powerful for me that I plan to go have a session as soon as I can to clear some more things. You can read more at www.holographickinetics.com and see if there is a practitioner near you.
Lastly, know that those of us who are older than you don’t have the answers. Only you have the answers you seek. Ignore the outside voices and inner voice telling you what you “should” do and listen and feel into what you think you’d be really excited to do! The world is changing. The way things have been done are not the way they are anymore. Follow your joy! Follow your passion! Follow your own intuition and take a leap and ENJOY THE RIDE! You’re only a new college graduate once! Live it up!”
College Graduate: “Thank you so much for your kind words! It means so much & appreciate you taking the time and everything you’ve posted!
Thank you for the link as well, I’ve seen some of your posts mentioning it but thought I was too far for all of these practices that I see on IG in general. I read through the list and someone is near me! I’m going to look more into it and reach out to (practitioner name) 🙂
And I agree the world is changing, I’ve heard how many of the more creative fields will actually come back in demand, which is really nice (since I was lead to believe my degree was pointless)
However, it’s sometimes hard for me to distinguish which voice is which, how do you know when it’s your intuition speaking? (& not ur ego/ socialization)”
Me: “I wouldn’t worry about what ‘they’ say about any field. It doesn’t really matter. You just need to find the thing you’re most passionate about at any given time and do that! Success is inner peace, not the outside rewards like you’ve been taught.
Your spirit speaks to you through your intuition. Choosing based on live instead of fear can help you tap into it. As can following your joy and doing what you feel called to do even when the outside is telling you differently. Your intuition won’t ‘should’ you and make you feel guilty for things. It won’t talk negatively to you or get you to compare yourself to others. Your spirit/intuition is much more quiet at first than your ego. But as you learn to quiet your mind (meditation is great!) and follow your intuition, it’ll get stronger and you’ll trust it more once you realize it always leads you to amazing people, opportunities, and situations. Learn to observe your thoughts and actions and question everything that you think, especially when it’s making you feel bad.
I don’t know if this is something you’d enjoy, but find a way to travel somewhere you’ve always wanted to go. Travel does so much for our self discovery. I assume you don’t have much responsibility yet, so now is the time to do the fun things. Jobs will be there when you get back and you’ll have a better sense of what you want to do. Have fun!!!”
College Graduate: “I was so worried about not wanting to play the game without direction, working for someone and all that, and was considering living in a hippie commune. I thought about what I actually like to do, writing & reading- I’ve always liked it, it’s a hobby of mine, it’s a “tool” I honed in college. I want to be a writer, and you’re right no one else could have told me that. I really had to purge all my stress to really see deep down. These answers lie within. Lies within our patterns, what we liked doing as kids, what we liked (but may have suppressed) now. I want to thank you again, your words sparked something in me after I really sat with them and my thoughts. This was all an abridged version of what I resolved but again, thank you. Much love ✨”
Me: “Oh this is so awesome to hear! I am so happy that you’ve found some answers for yourself. Your story and way of seeing the world is unique and you never know who can benefit from it. Write write write!!!! You are so welcome. Sending lots of love right back to you! Never lose your passion! Never stop following your own inner guidance! You are the only you and no one else can tell you how to live your best life. I hope you have a fantastic day!! ❤️”
Ripples people. Ripples! I’ll end this with a quote from the book “The Vortex” by Esther and Jerry Hicks:
“Most of the guidance, rules, and laws that are passed down from generation to generation are written by people who are not in the state of “allowing” their Connection with their Broader knowledge. In other words, the majority of the guidance that is thrust upon you has come from a perspective of lack, and it cannot lead you to an improved situation.”
Thank you for reading along! If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG or FB for more inspirational content. Sending you all so much love!
As I closed this post out, I had these lyrics for Digable Planets “Escapism (Gettin’ Free) (listen HERE!) pop into my head:
“Get free, get free y’all Get free, get free y’all Get free, get free y’all Get free, get free y’all”
It’s time we all get FREE! How? Alignment with our own spirits!
I realized at one point that most relationships I had gotten myself into were the result of the other person being into me, and me riding that wave. Next thing I knew, I was in a relationship that looking back, I sometimes don’t understand how it progressed so far, so rapidly. It can be so easy to get swept up by things and people outside of ourselves. The key is to cultivate an inner awareness and knowing that we learn to depend on. That way, we stay in our truth as we move through the world.
In my alignment with my own spirit, I am hyper aware of people’s energy. I can tell by a picture or a few messages from a person what kind of energy they’re bringing to the table. I’ve learned to trust people’s energy emphatically. It takes a lot of the guess work out of who I want to spend my time with, which then saves us all time. I no longer get myself into relationships with people based on their feelings for me. Instead, I pay attention to the energy between us.
As I’ve gotten better about staying true to myself and expressing myself more authentically, I have found that my energy is like a magnet. Often, people want to be around me. If I go on a date with someone, they always want more time with me. This isn’t an ego thing, it’s an energy thing. When people are living in their alignment, they understand that our energy is what is drawing us together. For people who aren’t yet aware of this invisible force, in my energy field, they’ll automatically think that we have a special connection unlike any other. But in alignment with my spirit, I am able to deeply connect with nearly everyone who crosses my path. I have long, interesting conversations frequently with a variety of people. I highly appreciate all of the connections I make with people. But I recognize that because most people aren’t living in alignment with their spirit, it’s up to me to be discerning about taking a relationship to the next level.
As humans, we can get so caught up in physical attraction, or the fact that someone is giving us positive attention that we can get ourselves into situations that aren’t always healthy for us. We’ve got to pay attention to how a person’s energy makes us feel. Are we excited when they text to hang out with us or do we find ourselves trying to come up with excuses to get out of it? Do we feel excitement and happiness or a sense of dread? We can also pay attention to feelings in our bodies when we say a person’s name. Do we feel light or heavy? Do we smile with happiness or feel a knot form in our stomach?
We are energetic beings living in an energetic world. We’ve all had the experience where a person’s looks, outward persona, and words were saying one thing, but their energy was giving off a completely different message. My old self bought into those things. If we want to go to the next level, we’ve got to place more importance on a person’s energy and how they make us feel rather than other outside things like their interest in us, their looks or financial stability. I have come to find that energy never lies, regardless of how smooth the person speaks. I even had the experience once where a person’s energy felt really off. I felt really uncomfortable about it, but couldn’t place my finger on why. A friend was insisting that I explain what the person was doing to make me feel that way, and all I could say was “nothing in particular, their energy isn’t matching their words.” Just after I had said those words, my friend was getting money out of an ATM, and I checked IG. The first thing in my feed read something like “if something feels off about a person or situation, it is. Trust your intuition. Energy doesn’t lie.” Messages from the universe don’t get more direct than that friends! It provided me with a little extra confirmation and I never hung out with that person again.
We’ve got to stop doubting ourselves, the energy we sense about situations and people, and the inspired ideas that are coming to us. We need to stop ignoring the signs and red flags. We never have to know or have proof beyond how something is making us feel. I don’t like the taste of coffee, and I’ve been told time and again how coffee is an acquired taste. People say how they didn’t like it at first, but now they love it. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just not how I’m choosing to live my life. Sure I’ll do it with vegetables, because I know they’re good for me. But I’m not trying to acquire a taste for coffee, or beer, or a connection with someone where I sense something off about their energy. It’s just not needed in this day and age. We don’t have to acquire a taste for relating with someone who’s presence does not add goodness to our lives. There are plenty of other things I enjoy drinking, and there are over 7 billion people in the world to connect with. There’s no need to latch onto and cling to situations or people that don’t make us feel good, because there is a plethora of situations and people who will better match our energy and intentions.
We just need to slow down and get really good about paying attention to how things make us feel. We then follow the good feelings and nudges from our spirit (our intuition). The more we learn to quiet our minds and listen to the whisper of our intuition, the stronger our intuition becomes. In doing so, we move beyond the conditioning from our past, and line ourselves up with the best that life has to offer.
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Seriously! Set yourself FREE and DANCE however you feel regardless of who is watching!
What are we worried about when we care so much about people seeing us dance and have fun? Like really, what do we think is going to happen?
I think generally we’re worried that people won’t like us. Or that they’ll think we’re weird and talk about us behind our backs. Or that they won’t want to be our friends or be seen with us.
Or….maybe it’s that we’re afraid that if we dance the way our bodies want us to, that maybe we’ll actually be seen. We’ve had experiences that have shown us that it’s much more comfortable for us to maneuver through the world sort of invisible. We’ve gotten so used to shirking away from any attention that we’ve gotten really comfortable with fitting in and remaining small. It’s easier to go unnoticed than to put yourself out there for everyone to judge. Right?!
Here’s the thing, trading in our joy for other people’s acceptance also trades away our freedom. Little by little, one small concession at a time. Eventually, we find ourselves unhappy, maybe even depressed, surrounded by people we don’t feel connected to, doing things that don’t light us up, with bodies riddled with dis-ease.
Our ultimate well-being comes from showing up in this world 100% us! Showing up authentically doesn’t mean dancing for everyone, but it does mean putting our own JOY ahead of what anyone else will think! It means doing the things that light us up the most regardless of who is watching! I’ve had to push myself past my own fears and insecurities to the point that I will dance just about anywhere, anytime. But there are things that are outside of my comfort zone, and it takes courage for me to push past my own perceived limitations and do them.
We’re all human. It takes courage for all of us to do things we haven’t done before, and to be the people we came here to be, but haven’t been before.
I have found that the amazing parts of life come from pushing past my comfort zone. And I’m telling you that in the last year of living this way, I’ve experienced the deepest connections of my life MULTIPLE times! One of those connections alone is worth every ounce of nerves I felt as I stepped into full alignment with my spirit!!
So stop being afraid of what/who you’ll lose if you show up in all of your glory, and start being excited about the path you’re going to be placed on when you align with your own spirit! The people you stand to lose because you dance however you feel or say what’s in your heart, are NOT your people to begin with. Your people will be the ones dancing with you! Your light will not blind or offend your people. Your people will be attracted to your light like a lighthouse shining down on a dark sea. Be YOU! Own your space! Own your light! DANCE however the hell you want to, BECAUSE everyone is watching and they need to see examples of people aligned with their spirit! DANCE ALIGN ELEVATE THRIVE!
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If you’re tired of living with the same limitations, patterns, and behaviors, consider trying a session of Holographic Kinetics with me. You have to be local to see me, but there are practitioners worldwide. Holographic Kinetics is a powerful healing modality based on Dreamtime Healing of the aboriginal people of Australia. You can learn more by visiting http://www.holographickinetics.com.
“Life is much too short to continue to wait for someone else’s permission to fully live.”
Often we don’t realize we’re doing it, waiting for permission that is, but many of us are. Who are you giving your power away to?
Your parents? The ones who think that you should follow the status quo, because even after their divorce and decision to not date, they still believe that ultimate happiness for everyone lies in the house, the fence, the marriage, and the kids? When are you going to realize that you don’t have to live up to your parents’ expectations of you in order to be a fully whole and worthy human being? If your parents shoot down every idea you present to them that lights you up, stop telling them your plans. Stop asking for their opinions. Your journey is yours alone, and sometimes even your parents won’t understand you. And that’s OK.
Your kids? Maybe you’re a parent and you have Mom guilt about taking a trip alone. I know I did before I left for Western Australia in June of ‘18. Even though my son had balked at the idea of such a long flight, I still felt bad that he wasn’t going with me. But, at one point, I realized that it wasn’t right to put the burden of not following my life-long dream on my son’s shoulders. I think we wrongly do that a lot. We categorize ourselves as parents and then feel bad for anything we do outside of that role without our kids. We’re essentially feeding into the notion that our joy and self-care stops being important once our kids are born. But, if I have learned anything at all, it’s that I am a much better Mom when I have been consciously keeping my own bucket full. Our kids will be much better off if they have parents who take good care of themselves body, mind, and spirit. Our kids learn by what they see us do, not from our words, so in taking care of ourselves, we’re showing them how to take care of themselves. It’s not selfish, it’s vitally important.
Your partner? Perhaps they don’t like to do the things you want to do, and so you’ve just given up and decided that it’s easier if you just don’t do them. If you’re living that way, it’s only a matter of time before you lose yourself completely. It’s depressing to live a life in which you’re not following your joy. If your partner loves you unconditionally, then they will understand that it’s important for you to do things regularly that bring you joy. Maybe that’s not it, but you’ve been miserable for a long time and you’ve tried counseling and nothing is working. Your partner hasn’t made any effort towards making the partnership better, but then tells you they don’t want it to end. Know that you do not need their permission to leave. Know that any outsider who judges you for your feelings about your relationship has no business doing so, because they’re not in it. They can’t understand your experience, and they can’t see the dreams you hold for your life. It’s OK to let go. You don’t need anyone else’s permission but your own. I had friends offer their two cents as I was deciding on what to do about my own marriage. All it did was add to my guilt for feeling the things I felt. I stopped talking about it with other people, and ultimately made the decision that was best for me and my family. Side note: if you’re reading books titled things like “Should I Stay or Should I Go?”, it’s really time to leave. If it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a no. That goes for any decision in life.
Even when advice comes with good intentions, no one outside of us should hold power over us when it comes to living our best lives. Our journey is unique to us, and we’ve got to stop trying to get others to understand it before we feel comfortable enough in making decisions. We have one life to live. Make it count.
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I am living proof that great pain can lead to massive transformation.
I spent much of my life as a peacekeeper and people-pleaser. I put the peace of a space and others’ well-being above my own. I became a sort of chameleon, changing in small ways to try and reduce tension in my house growing up, and later as a way to keep other people comfortable. I had an innate sense that if everyone around me was OK, that I would then be OK too. But I wasn’t OK. With each concession I made to create less waves, I moved farther and farther away from my true self. I didn’t notice it at first and couldn’t have predicted the level of depression and dis-ease that changing myself for others would cause someday.
When I found myself in a loveless marriage where I was lonelier than I have ever felt in times where I have actually been alone, I ignored what my heart was telling me. I had been so adamant about creating a family for my son, to be a happy, intact family that I hadn’t experienced, that to follow my heart meant to leave that dream behind for all of us. So, I ignored that knowing sense that I felt. I buried myself in raising my son. But it could not last forever. Eventually, my heart grew weak and nearly stopped working and I found myself at rock bottom. In one fell swoop, my health was taken from me, and I nearly died of heart failure. An emergent heart surgery later and I slowly began to find my way back to myself.
The recovery felt fast at first, until it became apparent that my heart condition was going to be a recurring theme in my life. Doctors had trouble figuring it out, and so they did what they could to ward it off with a steroid bandaid in the form of prednisone pills.
There are lots of parts to this story, but the take away is much more important at this point, for me and for you.
1. Stop putting yourself second to the wishes of others. Humans are fickle beings, and won’t stay happy for long before you’re feeling the need to do more to feed their happiness. You don’t have the ability to make anyone else happy if they themselves haven’t found a way to cultivate happiness in their own life. We can add to another’s happiness, but we are not responsible for creating it.
2. Stop changing yourself to fit in with the people around you. In the end, you’ll feel like a shell of yourself, plus you’ll soon realize that they’re not your people anyway. Who wants to hang out with people who don’t love you for being 100% yourself? The chameleon game is an exhausting one. You’ll find yourself eventually losing yourself and wondering how it happened. It happens in small, incremental changes you make in yourself to make others comfortable. You likely won’t realize it’s happening until you’ve forgotten even the basics of what you like to do for fun, and who you are at your core.
3. Stop doing things that stress you out, like really stress you out. If you’re in a relationship that adds more stress to your life than happiness, don’t feel bad about putting yourself first and leaving. You don’t have anything to prove to anyone by staying. Life is much too short to spend it with people who don’t light you up. Same goes with anything else in life.
4. Stop doing the same things over and over and expecting different results. It’s not only the definition of insanity, but it won’t get you into a different life that you’ve been imagining for yourself. If you want something different than what you currently have, you’ve got to be willing to move out of your comfort zone and do new things.
5. Start putting yourself first. Do things that make you happy, that bring you joy. What have you been putting off that you really want to do? What steps can you take towards doing it now? Start saying no to things you don’t want to do.
We can use our experiences to guide us in life or we can use them to feel like victims. The choice is ours. If you’re stressed, or sick, or not living your best life, it’s time to look at the areas of your life that are no longer working for you. The days of being a people-pleaser, peacekeeper, and martyr are over. The time has come for us all to realize our limitless potential to create a life of our dreams. Life is much too short to continue to wait for someone else’s permission to fully live! Give yourself the permission you need to go after your dreams like this is the only shot you’ve got!
I am passionate about working with people and encouraging them to follow their joy and passion towards living a life in alignment with their soul’s purpose (ie. living their best lives). Guiding others in this way and offering the confirmation that they need to follow their dreams lights me up like nothing else! Please follow me on Facebook and/or Instagram for more written content and impromptu FB Live videos. If my words resonate with you, please feel free to reach out to me at email@example.com to tell me about it! I love connecting with people!! Maybe you have a topic you’d love me to write about?
Photo excerpt from “Life Visioning” by Michael Bernard Beckwith
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