Healthcare?

Don’t be so quick to dismiss things that are new to you. Those new ways of thinking and being and healing could be the keys to your healing and living your best life. They were for me.

There’s a reason why so many people are gravitating towards natural healing modalities and away from western medicine and the pill factory that has become “healthcare” in the US. Our current system as it stands is FAILING us big time!

It only takes getting something serious like Lyme disease to find out the bullshit way insurance companies and big pharma are running this show. For instance, did you know that it’s the insurance companies governing how doctors are “allowed” to treat Lyme disease? Do you know that because of this, thousands of people (including me) are forced to pay out of pocket for adequate treatment from a Lyme Specialist who has decided that actually treating the illness is the only way and can’t be done while under the thumb of health insurance companies? As you can imagine, payoff is bigger when you play nice with insurance companies, so there is a greatly unbalanced supply-demand ratio of Lyme Specialists to patients. I’m positive that there are people dying because they can’t afford adequate treatment for Lyme disease and they have to just take their doctor’s word for it. I had great insurance, but my specialist visits weren’t covered by it. The only way I continued with that care is because I became a nurse and could afford it. There were times as a nurse that my bank account was going negative between paychecks because I was paying $700 every 12 weeks to see my amazing Specialist who was helping me battle multiple infections. In fact, it’s a good thing I went to her, because every other doctor I had seen up to that point had neglected to tell me (or read the blood results) that showed I had tested positive for Valley Fever during a hospital stay. She was the only one who told me or treated me for it after having the test run by an infectious disease control doctor at the hospital, YEARS after the fact.

I’ve heard people say that things like energy healing or craniosacral therapy are “voodoo” (that don’t have negative side effects) without knowing anything about them, but they have no problem with having to suffer the side effects from medications their doctors are selling for which they then have to take ANOTHER medication! Doctors are just humans with more years of schooling by the way. They don’t and can’t know everything about everything. Most know a little about a lot. Some (specialists) go to even more school and know a lot about a little. There was a time that I was playing that game. In truth, medications have no side effects, only effects. When you take medication with serious side effects, you’re essentially choosing all of its effects (both wanted and unwanted) over your ailment. When I instead choose to take a prescribed homeopathic remedy, i got immense healing courtesy of my own body’s healing abilities getting switched on without ANY unwanted effects. It also allowed me to eventually come off of my medications for Lyme et al.

School teaches us the program (the more schooling you have, the more programmed you are), and then it’s up to US to choose our own, REAL well-being and the well-being of our brothers, sisters, and children over what we’re being taught. How many people aren’t getting any answers from their doctors and are taking medications that aren’t working, yet they’re STILL following the same protocol fed to them month after month, year after year? That’s insanity! That’s when I got curious and started trying other things, because for years, the meds weren’t healing me, they were temporarily controlling my symptoms. I’d go off the medication, and all of the symptoms would come back. It’s almost like we’ve come to accept the fact that there’s no hope for better health and well-being for us. We’ve been settling for mediocre care and mediocre treatment. And the system reflects it by serving up more of the same. I am generalizing here, because as a whole, the system is broken. I’ve been to the local clinics as a patient where I felt more like part of a cattle herd than human. I have friends who feel like they aren’t even treated like a human when they go to a clinic. Seen for a few minutes, not listened to or heard. It’s not OK.

Here in the Central Valley, our issues are compounded, because of the fact that we live in a medically under served area. We have more patients than doctors. We have less access to care overall, and in turn to quality care. Here, we have to take what we can get, and many people are being failed. In general, this system is failing us, because it has taught us to believe everything our doctors say, and it’s taught them that the best treatment for most things comes in pill form. People think that their doctors know best, yet their doctors only know what they are taught or seek. Big pharma has their hand in all of it, so typically they are taught big pharma‘ pitch. I would venture to guess that most people in healthcare who are open to alternative therapies, or even know about them, do because of their own health-history and the benefits they’ve had with them. NOT because they taught us anything about it in school. I have an amazing Nurse Practitioner who researches and goes the extra mile and diagnosed me when even doctors at Stanford hadn’t been able to. Good primary care folks DO exist. But, I’ve also gone to doctors who couldn’t figure out what was going on with me and were visibly offended and dismissive when I excitedly told them that I had gotten answers, the correct treatment, and was doing well. Thinking they’d be happy to have the mystery solved, I was surprised when they preferred to repeat some taught rhetoric that Lyme disease isn’t in California. Raise your hand if you’re in California and that pisses you off too! (BTW, we barely heard about Lyme in nursing school. Yep, even with an estimated 300,000 new cases a year. We had a teacher whose daughter had it, otherwise it was a blip). The best thing that practitioners can do for all of us is to do their own research. The problem is that the time to do it isn’t built into their work schedule. Those that do, sacrifice their time away from work. As a nurse, I can tell you that work, meetings, trainings, and certifications took up a lot of my time. When I was in it, I didn’t have the energy to research. Probably why my life was designed to have me be my own research, my own test subject. With no answers from my doctors and recurring pericarditis, I had nothing to lose.

WE are the ones we’ve been waiting for. WE are the ones that can change the system by doing the things that work for us vs what is being pushed on us. Our money talks. If we don’t like the system, we have to start making different choices. We are failing ourselves when we remain closed minded to new ways of doing things and just accept the status quo even when it isn’t serving us well. We can’t continue to hide behind phrases like “oh, my insurance doesn’t cover that.” So what? People will spend money on gadgets, beer and wine, fancy cars, so they CAN choose to spend that money on their well-being. How important is your one body in this lifetime to you? How important is the well-being of your body, mind, and spirit? There’s no guarantee that you’ll be able to buy back your health once you lose it.

In our current system, the focus has been where there is the opportunity to make the most money. Our current “healthcare” system is a money-making system built on making sure we stay sick and in the dark about these things. Of course it is full of good-intentioned people who want to help people heal, it’s just that their capacity to do so is very limited within the confines of all the red tape. Do you know how many times I (and I’m sure MANY other healthcare professionals) left the hospital and cried after a shift, because the tasks placed on me prevented me from feeling like I could be the nurse I so desperately wanted to be? If I spent 15 minutes with someone listening to them as they processed their new cancer diagnosis, I’d risk falling incredibly behind in my charting and would sometimes have to stay hours late after my shift to catch up. I’d choose to listen every time, but not without a potential cost in the form of stress and further energy depletion for the extra long shifts and negative feedback from my bosses.

Currently, our government (FDA) is working to make various supplements unavailable to us over the counter, because they work and they’re currently not getting paid for them. Enter in big pharma patenting supplements and selling them for a steep price. Enter in the government getting in on the new marijuana/CBD industry when they’ve found a way to grab their slice of the pie. (Uhhh maybe legalize and then tax it for starters?) Any substance is only an issue when the government, big insurance, and big pharma (all the same entity) aren’t getting their cut. When people aren’t strung out on THEIR drugs. Today’s money maker is the flu vaccine so they push it, but, maybe tomorrow’s will be CBD oil or hallucinogenic plants, or some other thing that they’re toting as ‘bad’ now that will suddenly turn ‘good’ later when they figure out how to (or it becomes more acceptable to) market it and turn a profit. The real change is going to come from our own alignment with our spirit when we realize that we’ve had the ability to heal ourselves from within this whole time, after being fed the notion that all cures to everything come from without. Nope. Everything is an inside job.

It’s OK to face the fact that you’ve been lied to. It’s OK to change your mind. It’s OK to try new things even though your church or friend or teacher or doctor warns you against it. I am a Registered Nurse who has been the patient AND the nurse. I’ve experienced western medicine, and I’ve also tried many alternatives. A combination of the two saved my life. But it was the alternatives that continued to work for me without unwanted effects long after the pills had had their awful way with my body. I have also healed myself, because I have healed my thoughts about my illness. I decided that because I was feeling good, I was cured. A placebo thought that changed my entire game. Healing my mind changed my life for the better. No medication or complimentary therapy can compare to changing our thoughts and beliefs (beliefs are merely thoughts that you’ve thought over and over and over), and aligning with our own spirit.

Can you even imagine how much my beliefs have shifted to go from a wildlife field biologist, to a patient of western medicine to alternative therapies to career in nursing to career in Holographic Kinetics, and Mindfulness Coaching and Education (to name a few of my current projects)? Because of my training to always believe in science and what could be “proven” by it, I’ve had to read countless books to wrap my head around the fact that we are spiritual beings having a human experience. It was by design that I was exposed to treatments with benefits that science wasn’t explaining or supporting. Luckily, it made me stop blindly trusting in science and “healthcare”. When I learn something new, I try my best to put my judgment aside so that I can weigh everything as a valid possibility. In this year as I’ve been wrapping my head around the multidimensionality of us and this universe, I have realized that nothing is as it seems. So who am I to keep rigid beliefs about anything given that fact? My mind is open to seeing things in a new light and changing my perspective. Is yours? If not, why are you holding on so tight to what you have been taught? Why are you holding so tightly to what you believe? How are your current beliefs serving you? How are they failing you? The proof is in your life. How much inner peace and well-being are you experiencing? That’s the new measure of “success” for me.

Some of this is difficult to think about this way, because it challenges our careers, our livelihoods and our egoic identities, the things we have devoted our time (away from our loved ones), energy, and money to. I get it, because here I am with a Registered Nursing degree feeling like it completely goes against the integrity of my own spirit to use it to practice as a nurse with the way things stand right now. I wouldn’t be able to do many of the things I’d be required to with a clear conscience anymore. I wouldn’t be able to hold in my knowledge of alternative therapies when I came across a patient who could really stand to benefit from it. The incongruent nature of my actions vs thoughts would drop me out of alignment with my spirit, and that’s the most expensive price I could ever pay for a paycheck. Not. Worth. It. People trade their alignment for a paycheck every day, within all professions by settling or doing work they hate.

So break out of your old ways of thinking and read something that challenges your current beliefs. If your medication isn’t really helping you anymore (or never has) and your doctor doesn’t have any answers, it may be time to try something alternative and natural that won’t give you more symptoms to worry about.

If we want a different reality, we’ve got to do different things. But the step between a new experience we want, and taking new actions is becoming aware of our thoughts and shifting them, so that they no longer get in our way of the very thing that could help us the most. We are our own worst enemies. We place limits where there would otherwise be none. We’ve become too rigid in our thinking. We’ve been taught to attack anything that disrupts the programs we’ve grown up in, including each other. Really, the only things we need to learn are how to think for ourselves and to question everything.

Thank you for reading along. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on Instagram/Facebook for more thought-provoking and inspirational content. Sending you all so much love!

Trauma

An event is traumatic, because it causes us to decide something about ourselves or about life that we then create from ever after. In the moment of a traumatic event, we lock in beliefs that life then continues to prove true, since what we believe we experience. The event can cause a lot of pain and suffering in the moment, but it’s our continual reliving of the beliefs we acquired through it that truly cause us to suffer over and over again.

It is my changed perspective about myself and life that continues to shape my experience, not the original traumatic event itself. We are powerful creators, so if something makes us decide at some point at conception or beyond that we are not worthy of love, then we will create situations and relationships over and over again to prove that belief. I had that cycle repeating in my own life. Luckily, through my personal sessions of Holographic Kinetics, I was able to clear that belief at the spirit level, so I no longer have to carry it around to have it surface time and again in this life and future lives. Phew!

So much of what we come to know about ourselves and the world is taught to us within a system that places more value on our physical reality than on the fact that we are all spiritual beings having a temporary human experience. Our multidimensionality and that of the universe tends to be completely overlooked. So, a lot of spiritual information then doesn’t tend to fit neatly into the confines of what we’ve been taught our whole lives. This leads to major disconnect and feelings of dis-ease. We begin bottling up the things we think or feel that don’t fit with what we’ve been told by our families, teachers, friends, and the organizations to which we belong (Wow, organizations we belong to, think on that for a minute. I personally don’t want to ‘belong’ to any organization). We sometimes label these things as “wrong”, or have the people we open up to do it for us. The reality is that usually the discourse we feel is because our own inner knowing doesn’t match up with what we’re being told/taught. I have learned to always trust the inner knowing above everything else. We have all of the answers we seek inside of us.

The reality is that the world we live in is nothing as it seems. We have been taught to place so much importance on the outer world and things out of our control that we’ve lost sight of the fact that WE are the ones that can free and heal ourselves. To take our power back means to stop giving it away to others. We’ve got to snap out of victim-mode ASAP. There is no one else to blame if we continue to relive our traumas and not do the work to get out of the cycle of similarity we’ve become trapped in by our own beliefs. I’m not saying it’s easy, but I am saying it’s necessary if we want to finally start listening to the nudges of our spirits and break free from old patterns and programming, so that we can get on with living our best lives.

I have done a lot of inner work. I keep being guided deeper and deeper to clear more and more from my past. We are so powerful that we can set intentions and tell our spirits what we want, and then notice that we will be guided to the people, situations, and resources to help us. How many of you set an intention to level up and/or clear out what was no longer serving you and have experienced people and situations clearing out of your life in record speeds this year? We asked for all of it. Right now, I am being urged to drive several hours away to the nearest practitioner to have another Holographic Kinetics session. As I’ve cleared issues on my own, and through HK, other issues have moved to the surface as the next important parts in need of healing. Remember, the growth and healing doesn’t stop until we die. But, in my own experience, it does stop feeling so severe, because I can more easily recognize what is happening. If you are being guided to a specific type of healing, I urge you to follow it. When I have done that, I have found another piece of the puzzle that helped me on my path back to my innate well-being.

Several years ago, I was sick of being depressed. I wasn’t actively depressed when I decided this, but I was suffering greatly. My thoughts about my situation were primarily negative and I felt stuck in a life that I didn’t feel I had chosen for myself. As I dug myself out of those beliefs, I began to see some light at the end of the tunnel. I realized that it wasn’t really my outer experience causing me to suffer, but my belief about it! This was huge! I remember getting very annoyed with a woman I worked with for a time when she’d say that things were the way they were supposed to be, because that’s what was happening. How easy is it to think that everything is happening for a reason when we’re enjoying life?! Not so much, it seems, when we’re unhappy with our lives. But, it’s important to realize that we can’t think that things are happening as they are meant to in some cases AND believe that we’re victims of circumstance in others. It doesn’t work that way. Because there is so much more to this life, we do not always consciously know what energy is being balanced out by a situation, or what lessons a person’s spirit is wanting them to learn. We’ve got to stay in our own lanes of being and focus on our own growth.

That being said, we are often stuck in time and repeating cycles of similarity. One way to work through this is to become aware of the dynamic happening and then ask ourselves what our role in it has been. When we take responsibility for our lives in this way, positive shifts happen because we take back our power. Standing in our own power and our own innate sense of knowing moves us towards alignment with our own spirit. An example in my own life is that it doesn’t serve my highest good to complain about a past relationship with a narcissist. Even labeling the person that way isn’t helpful for me, though it is helpful in reaching the people who need this message. What helps me is to see the role I played in that relationship. What led me to it? I fully recognize that I knowingly gave up my power at the start of it. I had been in a relationship where I made so many of the decisions and I was tired of it. I was excited to spend time with someone who liked to plan our time together. Suddenly, I wasn’t the one planning all of the hikes. It felt like a relief to not make the decisions for a while. But then that led into giving my power away about other things. Next thing I knew, I no longer felt in control of my own life. But it started with ME. Realizing that has allowed me to become aware of and see the parts of me that were drawn to that relationship. I’ve then been able to work towards a much deeper level of healing from that place of awareness.

As much as we like to think that we know where an issue originated, in my sessions of Holographic Kinetics, I have been shown time and again that often, we are not actually consciously aware of the cause. Many times, a trauma in childhood merely activates an issue that spirit has been carrying through from lifetimes ago. Or, from a trauma that a grandfather or great grandmother locked in at the spirit level and began passing down to future generations. As we are spiritual beings first, our issues don’t always originate in this lifetime. It is our minds that will try and connect an issue to an event that we can consciously remember in an attempt to make sense of it. Sometimes, trauma happens as a result of something our parents say or do when we are in the womb, or when we are little babies less than a year old. Just the same, we lock in beliefs about ourselves or life in those moments, and begin to unconsciously create our reality from them.

In the Holographic Kinetics sessions that I do, I have witnessed a person’s spirit take them back to a point just after conception (yes, in their Mother’s womb) many times as it finds the cause of the first activation or creation of an issue in this lifetime. How is that possible? How can we be aware of anything when we have barely been conceived? It is because we are spirits first and foremost. As the aboriginal people explain it, our spirit is what is with us through this life as well as through all of our past lives. Our spirit is aware of the cause of ALL of the issues that are holding us back in this life. Holographic Kinetics allows us to communicate with our spirit and help it change the past in the present for the future.

You see, our spirits do not wish to relive the same lesson and limiting pattern over and over again. No, our spirits yearn to be free, so that they can experience the full range of creation in this life. This is why we have all been feeling so called to clear our old issues and baggage that we’ve possibly been carrying around for many lifetimes. Our spirits are guiding us to the changes we need to make in order to break free from the self-imposed/accepted limitations we’ve allowed for far too long. We can heal ourselves by listening to our spirits/higher selves/intuition. Our spirit knows what we need in order to thrive in this life. When we listen to that inner guidance/knowing, we are naturally led into alignment with our own spirit which is the place from which everything we seek is possible.

I urge you to begin to follow your intuition about everything. How do you know it’s your intuition and not your old patterns speaking? The inspired ideas you get from your spirit will leave you feeling excited. The guidance will be to things that make you feel good. In fact following your joy and what feels good to you is another way to align with your spirit. As you follow the guidance from your spirit/intuition, your ability to do so will strengthen. Over time, it will become second nature and you will come to trust it more. I have a way of asking for guidance from my own spirit that gives me answers based on the feeling I get in my body.

We all have the power to heal our trauma, so that it stops causing us to repeat the same cycles over and over. The answers to that healing really lie within each of us. We are all drawn to what we need, when we need it. I was drawn to numerous healing modalities before being pulled in a big way to Holographic Kinetics. It was all important, because it all led me to an expanded awareness and deeper healing. It’s like each thing allowed for wellness, so I’d be ready for the next level of healing. My healing didn’t happen all at once, or through only one modality. It’s as if I was being groomed to be able to wrap my head around the healing at the spirit level. I experienced such profound healing of my past wounds through Holographic Kinetics, and I continue to be amazed (not surprised) by the ways that I see it help my clients or friends afar who go to practitioners near them. I have witnessed it shift a friend out of severe suicidal thoughts and back into their previous excitement about the year to come immediately following their first Holographic Kinetics session. I will be speaking about this at a Mental Health and Mindfulness focused Visalia Talks and Wine in January, so stay tuned.

Mindfulness isn’t just about being present in our moments and grateful for what we have, it’s about developing a conscious awareness of the beliefs we have that are holding us back. In Holographic Kinetics, when we find the cause of an issue, our spirit is able to change that dimension of time, so that we break free from the beliefs about ourselves that continue to re-traumatize us through time on all levels and all dimensions.

If you’d like more information about Holographic Kinetics, email me at peacefuljellyfish@gmail.com. Check out my testimonials page at the top of this blog for feedback from a few of my clients. I am also happy to speak on any of the topics I cover in this blog at events or organizations who are interested in learning more. Email me with inquiries.

Thank you for reading along! If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG/FB for more inspirational posts. Sending you all so much love!

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Free to be ME!

My beautiful, visible wings are courtesy of talented artist, Mikayla Gutierrez, on Ziaya’s store!

I feel more ME right now than I ever have in my entire life! Well, at least in the time that I can consciously remember. I’ve been slowly peeling back the layers I had plastered on to please people and keep others comfortable. I dropped the chameleon skin I picked up during childhood in exchange for my authenticity. I used my joy and my intuition to light the way in this unearthing of my true nature. I dug back to my childhood and remembered what had once brought me the most joy and had made me feel most alive. As I did these things and explored more, I picked up the pieces of myself that I had lost along my journey.

There’s a reason why human transformation is often likened to the changes that a caterpillar endures during the process of becoming a butterfly. My inner work and process to alignment with my spirit hasn’t always been pretty. There have been times of exhilaration as I’ve realized a pattern, changed it, and have experienced the positive outcome. But there have been times wrought with tears and fear when I just wanted to fast forward through the growth to more comfort.

Returning to our true selves pushes us out of the comfort zones that we’ve known and into deeper states of awareness, healing, and well-being. At its core, transformation is uncomfortable. We cannot choose both, comfort AND transformation, but in my experience, transformation is worth every ounce of my discomfort. From my place of understanding, the caterpillar does not have the conscious awareness to know that going into a dark cocoon does not mean death. In a lot of ways, does not the caterpillar die? We can argue that the caterpillar who entered the cocoon and the butterfly that exits it are two different things. But because one was a living being and the other is a living being, we deduce that no true death of the spirit occurred. Spirit just went from one outward display to another. In the same way, I have completely transformed, though to some, the outward effects may be less visible.

We empower ourselves through our authenticity and vulnerability in showing up fully as who we each came here to be. We have been fooled. It is not a positive to conform to the crowd. In fact, conformity weakens our spirit. When we are always worried about what other people think of us, or if they like us, we disconnect from our own spirits which eventually leads to dis-ease of our body, mind, and spirit.

Choosing to remain in situations purely because we are comfortable can be likened to a caterpillar choosing to not enter into the cocoon stage of development. Sure, it’s life will go on and it will enjoy a life of eating leaves, but it will be missing out on living it’s full, potential expression as a butterfly. Change can be scary, but routine and comfort zones do more to kill our spirits than any change ever will.

I’m living proof to trust your journey. Regardless of where you are on your path of growth, you will be guided to bigger and better things when you adjust your sails towards living your best life. The process can be dark and scary at times, but that’s just a cocoon phase and it doesn’t last forever. On the other side of the cocoon is a life full of more freedom, joy, and love than you have ever known! That new way of being won’t be because any outside circumstance has changed, but because YOU have changed. Your way of looking at things has changed. The little things become the big things and the gratitude for all of it overtakes you. Do your best to flow with your transformation. When you go as a river, you release suffering as you trust your journey. You have the same ability as me to come out on the other side with your very own set of wings! Trust.

Thank you for reading along! If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it! Follow me on IG/FB for more inspirational posts. Sending you all so much love on your own transformative journey!

Healing for the Spirit

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So much focus has generally been placed on the health of our bodies and minds, but not of our spirits. The well-being of our spirits is the missing link to why so much of what we’re doing is not working. At our core, we are energetic, spiritual beings having a human experience. When we neglect this fundamental aspect of ourselves, we lack holistic well-being.

According to the beliefs of the aboriginal people in Australia, it is our spirit that is with us in this life and all past lives that we have lived. We are multidimensional beings living in a multidimensional world, which means that nothing is as it seems to our limited five senses. My training to become a Practitioner in Holographic Kinetics in May, an advanced healing modality based on the Dreamtime Healing of the aboriginals in Australia, taught me so much about our spirits and the power of healing at the spirit level.

In my career as a Registered Nurse, I was taught that physical ailments primarily had physical causes. Because they couldn’t find a definitive cause, my doctors wanted to place their bets on my immune system being “over active” as the cause for my pericarditis. They liked to say that my immune system was ‘attacking itself’. But that was not the case AT ALL. In the end, I was found to have a multitude of infections associated with the bite from a deer tick. Plus, I tested positive for Valley Fever when tested in the hospital and no one ever told me or treated me for it. It took a thorough Lyme Disease specialist going through my records YEARS later to find that positive test result and prescribe treatment. So needless to say, my inflammation markers being through the roof and my pericardium being inflamed had definite reasons for being so that didn’t have anything to do with my immune system being the problem. My body was doing exactly what it was designed to do when it detected invaders to my system.

In my path back to my innate well-being, I have come to understand that there is much more to the causes of our physical and mental ailments than what we have been led to believe. For instance, I see a direct correlation between those of us who spent much of our lives putting other people first, while not taking good care of ourselves, and chronic, mystery illnesses. For me, it became apparent that the fact that I had stopped listening to my heart and my intuition had a direct impact on my heart. I have come to learn that most people seem to be dealing a lot with the consequences of not fully feeling their emotions as they come up. Louise Hays wrote books about this very thing, as have others. My training in Holographic Kinetics solidified this fact as we learned about how trauma and emotions can become crystallized in the body in the presence of stress and how this can lead to dis-ease in the body and become trapped also in our spirit.

I have come to learn that our minds and the way we perceive the world is what impacts our lives the most. When our minds tend towards the negative and we stew in negative emotions like anger, fear, shame, guilt, we start having physical ailments. I have seen how cleaning up my thoughts have allowed me to heal myself and transform my life.

I started by hitting a point where I noticed I was suffering, and I was tired of it. I began thinking that there had to be another way to live that didn’t involve me being miserable. I realized that I wasn’t talking very nicely to myself. When I made mistakes, I beat myself up for it. I still struggle with being my toughest critic when it comes to certain things. But overall, once I became aware of my negative self-talk, I could begin to shift it. I have learned that self-awareness is the key to creating lasting change. Shifting my self-talk to the positive was the first step. Instead of thinking I was stupid, because I messed up, I started to be proud of myself for trying. I began to use positive affirmations to feed my mind uplifting words daily. From there, I began noticing the stories of victimhood that I had been telling myself about things that had happened in my life. Instead, I looked for the divinity in those experiences and the lessons I had learned through them. I was guided to read books with the principle that as spirits, we in fact choose our families and plan out some bigger aspects of our lives before we incarnate. That was a concept that was entirely new to me. I was also reading many books related to other aspects of spirituality, and the power of our minds and the fact that our thoughts create our reality.

At this point in my journey, I can say without a doubt that by changing my thoughts, I have changed my life. In addition, I have done a lot of work to feel my emotions and release them as they come up. I pay attention to what I feed my body AND my mind in the way of what I read, watch, and listen to. Much of adulthood, I believe, is learning to feel and process our emotions as they arise vs getting overwhelmed and stuffing them deep down inside of us.

As I have experienced through my own Holographic Kinetics sessions and now through the sessions I have done with clients, the Cause of the issues affecting our lives right now stem from beliefs that we locked in, usually during childhood, about ourselves or about life at the spirit level. That belief isn’t something that we usually remember consciously, but it becomes locked in at the level of the spirit and we begin to create situations that prove that belief to be true. We only see what we believe. In this way, we create EVERYTHING in our lives, consciously or unconsciously. Most people are walking around unconsciously creating their lives. In the mindfulness I have cultivated in a variety of ways, I have become a conscious creator of my reality. In the places where I seemed to still be unconsciously creating, I was able to heal those issues through Holographic Kinetics. One of the issues I cleared during my own sessions was not feeling worthy of love. The Cause was found during my time in my Mother’s womb. By locking in the belief that I was not worthy of love, it set me up to create situations in which I did not feel worthy of love. In this life, we can only create that which we believe is true. If at the spirit level, we believe that we are not worthy of love, then life cannot show us situations that make us feel worthy of love.

At times, the Cause of an issue can be found during our childhood in this life. When we’re children, trauma can come in many forms, even from seemingly small things as perceived by our now adult minds, because as children, everything that happens can feel so large and important. Using Holographic Kinetics, in communication with a person’s spirit, it is possible to go back to the moment when a belief, related to an issue, was first created. We can then change that dimension of time, so that the Cause isn’t created and therefore the issue stops affecting a person’s current life and future lives. The healing that happens during a session extends back through a person’s ancestral line, as well as forward through the generations of descendants.

When a situation isn’t cleared after changing the dimension with the Cause in this lifetime, we explore and determine if the Cause that was activated in this life perhaps was originally created in a past life or somewhere within the genetic lines of either the Mother or the Father. I have had the personal experience of having my issues linked to multiple past lives as well as ancestors of mine who had locked in trauma that was getting passed down through the generations. If I ever doubted the concept of past lives and reincarnation, I definitely don’t now. I have seen places I have never been and experiences I’ve never had in this life.

The power of our minds is real. We don’t actually see with our eyes. We see what our brains allow us to see, usually based on our past experiences. We fill in the blanks of our current reality with our past. Our minds sift and filter everything around us, otherwise we would be even more overwhelmed by the stimuli that is constantly bombarding us, energetically and from our five senses. Our minds have a way of paying attention to the things around us that resonate with us personally. I tell my kids in my mindfulness classes that if we all take a walk down the street together, we would have very different experiences, because we would all notice different things. I might notice some flowers that were in my front yard as a kid. Someone else might notice a car their Mom has. None of us are ever experiencing the same reality. It’s why I’ve come to accept that no one else is ever going to truly understand me. As Esther and Jerry Hicks write in their book “Ask and It Is Given”, “Your current time-space reality, your current culture, your current ways of looking at things — all of the things that make up your perspective — have evolved over countless generations. In fact, it would not be possible to retrace all the desires, conclusions, and perspectives that have resulted in your unique point of view right here and now.”

It is important that we are all here right now. Each of us is needed or we wouldn’t be here. There is divine reason for EVERYTHING, even when our human minds can’t figure out what it could possibly be. It’s taking all of us to stand in our own power, to learn new ways of being as we learn to feel our feelings, stay present in our moments, and work to heal and release ourselves from our past. It is a combination of healing of the body, mind, and SPIRIT that leads us on a path back to our innate well-being. Well-being is our birthright. We can connect with it again when we connect with our own spirit.

If you’d like a deeper connection and healing at the spirit level, consider a Holographic Kinetics session with me. You can check out the first testimonials I have received from people I have already worked with HERE. It’s a powerful healing modality unlike any other I have encountered.

Thank you for reading along! If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Sending you all so much love!

Music for My Spirit

At the beginning of this year, I read an article that reminded me of the importance of seeing our favorite musicians live. It spoke of the joy that these experiences bring us and also to the fleeting nature of life and how we never know if we will have future opportunities to see our favorites perform. Music has always been a big part of my life. It has been my most consistent form of therapy.

The article inspired me, so I set the intention that I would see my top 3 favorites this year, Xavier Rudd, Michael Franti, and Matisyahu, and I manifested all three FRONT ROW CENTER! I appreciate the fact that they all create with lyrics that are uplifting, meaningful, spiritual, real, and generally clean so that I feel good listening to them all on repeat around my young son. They aren’t just amazing musicians, but also amazing people.

Matisyahu Grizzly Fest Fresno, CA May 5, 2019

I got to see Matisyahu on May 5th at Grizzly Fest in Fresno. I’ve been listening to Matis since June of 2016 when a family I was caring for in the hospital was listening to him in their room after having a new baby. I’ve listened to his albums on repeat so many times. He has played a big part in my transformation and awaking over the last 3 years. His music has gotten me through a lot! Aside from the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass concert my son went to when he was a baby, Matisyahu was my son’s first concert. We drove a few hours to the beach, so that we could see him live in San Luis Obispo. I taught my son how to get front row spots and keep them and he was all in. He was 8 years old at the time. We later met Matis after a show in Fresno and my son had him sign his shirt. As we stood there with him and had our picture taken, I could feel the good, grounding energy emanating from Matisyahu. That energetic impression of him has always stuck with me. Energy speaks volumes to me where oftentimes words and logic fall short. Matisyahu has amazing energy. My son and I have connected a lot through the concerts we’ve been to and Matisyahu’s music. His music also helped me a lot as I took my power back in my life, put myself first for a change, and quit my job in the hospital.

Michael Franti Avila Beach, CA
May 31, 2019

As my 40th birthday approached, I saw that Michael Franti and Spearhead were playing on the coast the day before, so I got myself a ticket for my birthday and drove over. I had a great time connecting with a couple who was also hanging out in the front before the show even began and the woman and I had a great conversation. I learned that she was interested in nursing and I shared about my leap of faith out of my nursing job in the hospital and of the Holographic Kinetics healing modality based on Dreamtime Healing of the aboriginal people of Australia that I currently use. We were both amazed when the opening band, Nattali Rize, announced that they were from Jamaica and Australia. In fact, the lead singer said that Michael Franti had found her on a beach in Byron Bay, Australia, the next place on my list to visit there! If you’ve seen my 21 day Michael Franti’s Show Me Your Moves dancing challenge videos on IG, then you already have a sense of why I love Michael’s music so much. He’s got some of the most uplifting lyrics around and a lot of it makes me want to dance! This show was extra special. Michael had a special guest, Jocelyn Goldman, come on stage and sing “Love Will Find a Way”. It’s a little girl I’ve seen videos of singing his music while playing the ukulele. The fact that kids can connect with him and his music is part of why I love him so much! He even had a bunch of kids come up on the stage and dance during his set. How cool is that?! I danced SO hard at this show! I got thanked for dancing during the opening band. And then I was straight up jumping for most of Michael Franti and Spearhead’s show. At the end of the show, I was blessed to have Michael come off of the stage and plant himself at the railing I was standing at RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! He stood there performing a song acoustically and I just had to look up at him to watch. I could have reached out and touched him. It was AMAZING! When he finished, he climbed over the railing into the crowd and I got to thank him and give him a hug. I was filled with so much joy that night! I felt like I was floating. It was the perfect way to ring in my freshest effin’ decade yet!

I was first introduced to Michael Franti and Spearhead by a coworker of mine in Alaska. After the job ended, she sent me a CD with a bunch of different artists and they were one of them. Several years later, I got to see them live at the Telluride Bluegrass Festival when I was working in New Mexico for the summer. I drove up with a group of coworkers in a VW bus and we had such a great time! There were years that I virtually stopped listening to music. I gave my power away and allowed myself to get lost in a marriage. The fact that I didn’t even want to listen to music should have been the biggest red flag of my life, but I didn’t listen and suffered the loss of my health because of it. Michael was there again once I was out of that situation. And he was there several years later when my health began cooperating and I was able to do the outdoor things I loved again. Often when I listen to Michael’s music, I am reminded of the summer of 2016 when I began to really get aligned with my spirit through following my joy as often as I could.

Xavier Rudd Whale Rock Music Fest Templeton, CA Sept 14, 2019

I got to see Xavier Rudd at the Whalerock Music Festival this September. My awesome friend Kamryn invited me to go with her. I discovered Xavier Rudd at a live show he did with Brett Dennen in Portland Oregon in about 2006. I was with friends who went to the show to see Xavier Rudd and didn’t know of Brett Dennen, and at that time, I was there for Brett Dennen and had never heard of Xavier. You can’t see a show like the one he put on and not become a huge fan! I was hooked from that point on. Xavier is from Australia. If you know me at all, then you know that I’ve been drawn to Australia and all things and people Australian my whole life. At the time of the show in Portland, Xavier sat surrounded by a circle of instruments that he, himself, was playing. He was a one man band. I had never before seen anything like it. He played a slide guitar in his lap, he kept a beat with his foot, and he wore a harmonica that he played in times when he wasn’t singing or playing the didgeridoo. I was blown away! Xavier has periods of time when he doesn’t tour in the US much, but luckily he was in California this year! We were front row center through his performance and we were both deeply affected by the loving, healing energy he was sending out that night. It was the most magical performance I have ever seen. My friend was moved to tears. I set the intention during the show to send Xavier and his band love from my own spirit. At one point, Xavier was standing right in front of me as he ended a song and he looked me right in the eyes for a long while as I was signing ‘I love you’ on both hands and saying it too. We smiled at each other. It’s a moment of connection between our humans and spirits that I will never forget for my whole life. He felt like family to me.

Friends, it’s time to prioritize our joy, because when we do, we align with our spirit which is the answer to everything else we want in this life. So go see your favorite musicians perform as often as you can! We get to choose what we feed our bodies, minds, and spirits. The more uplifting experiences we have, the more aligned we become, the more elevated our energy becomes, and the more we are able to THRIVE in this life. It’s time to stop surviving and start thriving! Seek out live shows of the musicians that you love! Seek out musicians who do good in the world. Seek out musicians whose lyrics have a way of always making you feel better. Seek out music that moves and inspires you at the spirit level. Every time we do these things for ourselves, we change our lives for the better, and therefore change the world for the better! Follow your joy and intuition to your alignment! You will be so happy you did! I am! When we cultivate inner peace, it is reflected back to us in the world. Do things that bring you peace and joy, and the world will be more peaceful and joyful.

You can see Michael Franti and Jocelyn Goldman perform “Once a Day” HERE.

Thank you for reading along! If you liked this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG at peaceful.jellyfish or FB on my Peaceful Jellyfish page for more inspirational content! Sending you all so much love!

Colleges and Universities are Part of the Programming

people coffee meeting team

Photo by Startup Stock Photos on Pexels.com

Consider the fact that those of us living in the US know that the history we were taught in school wasn’t an accurate depiction. European settlement and “heroes” are highlighted while the mass killing and displacement of NATIVE Americans is barely taught or extremely downplayed. Kids are still being taught the nonsense of how Thanksgiving commemorates the Europeans and Native Americans coming together to share a bounty. In the way that elementary school history is tailored to teach kids only what the powers that be want us to believe, so too do colleges and universities spoon feed us the knowledge from decided upon text books that give us the story/information that they want us to believe, in ALL subjects. This is why we must question absolutely EVERYTHING.

I understand that the fact that I was able to take out loans and go out of state for college is considered a privlege that not everyone gets to experience. I also understand the way things are set up makes a college degree a necessity for many types of professions. With that said, I want to pose to you that in this moment in time during a grand awakening where more and more people are waking up all the time to the truth that they are infinite consciousness in human form, the last thing people need is further programming from the system in the form of degrees.

The only people getting degrees should be those who are aligned with their spirit and have a strong knowing about their soul’s purpose in this life and it involves a line of work that requires a degree. Gone should be the days where high school students are blindly pushed by parents and the system to pick a career at the age of 18, and go to college right away because they feel like that’s just what they’re supposed to do. We’ve got to move past the fear-based programming, beyond focusing our energy on becoming what our families expect from us, and into a more heart-guided space of freedom and curiosity.

We have already seen young people graduating from four-year schools unable to find jobs. This is after going into MASSIVE amounts of debt as tuition keeps rising and rising! Having a college degree is no longer a guarantee for employment. Most of the time, newly graduated high school students don’t know themselves well enough to be able to choose a career and therefore a degree that’s going to resonate with them when all is said and done.

How many of us really knew what we wanted to do with our lives when we were 18? I remember picking my degree in marine biology based on my love for the ocean and marine animals. I loved animals, therefore I chose biology. I wanted to help the planet, so I chose a second degree in Environmental Studies, Conservation Biology. I didn’t know how I intended to use these degrees. At the time, I also saw going to college as a way to get out of the town where I grew up. It ended up working out, because my first career revolved around working on various wildlife and fisheries projects all over the US. Those positions required a science degree.

As I mentioned, tuition has gone through the roof since I was in school. It’s a terrible combination when we have young kids choosing to go to college from a place of fear or from pressure from their families, because it sets them up to go into many thousands of dollars in debt while possibly aligning them with a degree that they won’t use or a career that they hate. It’s an easy way to get lots of people trapped into a lifetime of debt that will require that they get locked into the slog of a 9-5 job. Read how the slog affects us in my last post “We’ve Been Locked in an Energetic Prison”.

If we, as the human race, want to see REAL change happen in this world, then we’re going to have to start looking at things, and doing things completely differently than we generally have been. We have to do new things and think new thoughts if we want different results. Part of this means assessing the pedestal that we’ve been placing higher education on. We have to be willing to contemplate if further schooling is actually teaching people how to learn and question things for themselves, or if it’s further locking them into the herd mentality where they believe everything they’ve been taught in school. And that they’ve been so trained to stay in line and care what other people think of them that they don’t dare question anything for themselves.

The peace and freedom of the human race is going to come from breaking free from the herd mentality while realizing that we know nothing about how the world actually works, because our five senses are THAT limited. We did not come into this life with odds something like 1 in 400 trillion to simply be a sheep and fall in line with everyone else. We are all different reflections of the same source/god/universe energy that is seeking out a new, different experience of the world through our own unique perceptions and actions.

Humans tend to get so locked into the belief systems that have been fed to them that they are willing to defend them with their lives — see wars waged over religious beliefs. We grow up believing that all that our teachers and parents tell us, because we don’t know any better. But, they were fed what they are teaching us. Then, we defend that knowledge and take personal offense if someone offers an opposing viewpoint to what the masses have been taught. Yet we supposedly live in a “free” society infamous for our “free” speech. Kids bully other kids who don’t ‘fit in’, and adults bully other adults through gossip, bad-mouthing, and cyber-bullying behind the safety of their screen when what someone is saying or doing falls outside of the PROGRAMMED ‘accepted norm’. You ever wonder where these ‘societal norms’ even come from? I have been really focusing on noticing my thoughts and beliefs and questioning all of them in the last several years. I really have come to know that I know very little of how this world works, so I am less inclined to hold so tightly to any belief that I have, even if it is one that I have been carrying around with me for a long time.

We’ve been programmed to be the police for each other, keeping each other ‘in line’. If you’ve never read the book “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz, then I highly suggest that you do. One of the agreements that I have found myself focusing on a lot over the last several years is to not take anything personally. The truth is that nothing anyone says or does is because of us. We are in a lot of ways, all living in own own, personal simulation game. Because there is so much going on around us at any given time, our minds have to block some of the stimuli from our awareness or it would all completely overwhelm us. So, based on our past experiences, our minds decide what is important for us to take note of. Two of us walking down the same street would have a completely different experience because our unique perceptions would be allowing and disallowing different information from entering our field of perception. For instance, I may notice flowers that are like the ones my parents used to grow in our front yard, while you may be oblivious to the flowers while instead noticing a car like the one you just bought recently. Because our individual realities are painted with what our mind chooses to focus on either subconsciously or consciously, our thoughts literally create our reality.

I am thankful for the experiences that my degrees have allowed me to have, but I also acknowledge the fact that I’ve had to spend a lot of time letting go of the beliefs that I was spoon fed in school, so that I could become a free-thinker willing to question everything I’ve been taught and had come to believe so strongly. I pay attention to my intuition when I learn something new, and only take the information that I can feel resonates with me. I release anything that doesn’t feel like my truth.

Just as someone who grew up within the confines of a specific religion has to reprogram their mind once they  realize that the church’s message is no longer resonating with them, I’ve had to reprogram my mind to not take everything touted by science as fact. The reality is that we are only being taught what our government and state wants us to believe. How many degrees of separation do you think stand between our government, and big pharma, big agriculture, big business, and colleges and universities? In my research, I’m finding not many. It’s all connected. And a the main intention behind these entities is overall control of the population and profit. This is why it’s imperative that we start releasing our grip on our beliefs, and questioning everything! We must not take anything at face value. If we want to be free-thinkers who instead of following the crowd, we must start following our own intuition and inner knowing.

Pay attention to the fact that many of us who grew up questioning everything, are usually the one in our families who felt alone and unlike everyone else. We were planted into our families to shake up the status quo. Our children are also playing this role on an even grander scale. As parents, it can be difficult to raise such strong-willed children, but it’s so important in the bigger picture. They are here to stretch and expand us and this dimension in time, while staying more true and authentic to themselves. We are meant to learn from them, not punish or drug them. We’re being shown that we need to do things differently if we want different results, so can you see the divinity of how our kids do things differently and don’t accept the answer of “oh we do it that way, because that’s just the way it’s always been done”?

Just in my healing journey alone, I have seen enough holes in science and my education to know that it’s not the end all, be all that it’s made out to be. Big pharma and insurance have far too much say in how we’re caring for people with dis-ease in this country. Doctors and hospitals receive large kick backs from both when they push certain medications and vaccinations. For example, the hospital I worked in began to require everyone to get a yearly flu vaccine even when the effectiveness of a particular year’s vaccine was shown to only be 10-30%. Do we really believe that this requirement has anything to do with preventing the flu? Question everything.

We have a bunch of mandatory vaccines being given to babies in the US which continues to increase every year, yet we have one of the highest mortality rates for babies of any country in the world. I would maybe believe that the US’ medical system and policies are on point when it comes to infant care if our babies here weren’t dying in record numbers especially given that we are a first-world country. We’re missing the mark big time. It’s time to question everything.

In my nursing program, we were not taught about Lyme Disease, something that I had been battling myself. The only mention of it to my class came because I had an instructor whose daughter had Lyme Disease. There is a huge conspiracy going on with the treatment of Lyme despite the fact that it is projected that the 30,000 new cases a year is actually probably closer 300,000. Find and watch “Under Our Skin” if you want more details about the agenda behind the lack of proper tests and treatment for Lyme. Insurance companies have such control over the treatment of Lyme, that it is virtually impossible to receive adequate antibiotic treatment without going to a specialist and paying out-of-pocket. Doctors have been taken to court and have lost their license to practice medicine over the treatment they prescribe. Doctors aren’t even educated on Lyme. When I was diagnosed, I had doctors in my  area who had been involved in my care get defensive when I told them I had Lyme, stating that there isn’t Lyme in this area. Bullshit. I know many people who have gotten it in this area. They seemed to take offense, because they weren’t the ones to figure out my mystery illness. I witnessed the most petty responses from my doctors including one that I had really come to respect. Question everything.

Alternative therapies such as homeopathy are often discredited, while big pharma medications are continually pushed on the general public through near constant commercials on TV and through advertising posted in every doctor’s office. The effectiveness of homeopathy is so downplayed even though it has been credited with the turnaround of many people’s dis-ease, including my own. Doesn’t it make sense that a treatment that’s minimally expensive, but has the propensity to get people off of their big pharma- supplied medications would be downplayed and vehemently argued against? Question everything.

We’re taught to protect ourselves from the sun, but we need it for vitamin D production. There are people who have been wearing sunscreen SPF 50 and covering up, and are STILL getting skin cancer. We have to wonder if the sunscreens are actually CAUSING the skin cancer. Try limiting sun exposure and covering up when you’re going to be in the sun for a long time. Question everything.

The two political parties roll out the same agendas term after term with slight variations to make us believe that one is doing better or worse than the last guy. It’s all the same thing being carried out by different puppets. Yet people hold such strong convictions that they turn on friends and family and allow their own energetic vibration to drop because of what the latest puppet is doing or saying. It’s meant to divide us and drop us into a lower vibrational state. Question everything.

The way to our alignment with our spirit is by jumping out of the herd mentality and following the beat of our own drum. We are all very unique versions of the same source on purpose. We should not seek from outside of ourselves for the knowledge that we all hold within.

We find our purpose when we show up as our 100% authentic and vulnerable selves ready and willing to do, say, and think new things even if no one else is doing it. That’s when we find our unique contribution to this world — through our own, unique, individual expression of the source energy that we all are.

Learn to educate yourself. Question everything. Accept only what resonates with you at your core, and release the rest. Read the banned and censored books (1984 anyone?). Expand your awareness to include the things that they don’t teach us in school. Consider that we are able to perceive very little in this world, so don’t hold tight to any one thought or belief. Much of what we’re taught is backwards from the way things actually are. Question everything.

Align with your own spirit, so that you allow your intuition to be your guide, not the voices from the outside world. We each hold all of the answers we seek.

Thank you for reading along. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. You might enjoy following me on IG for more uplifting content.

Our Thoughts Affect EVERYTHING!

This is from Esther and Jerry Hicks’ amazing book titled “Ask and It Is Given”.

YOUR THOUGHTS LITERALLY CREATE YOUR REALITY!

Every issue we have has a Cause. We experience something in this life or a past life (or an ancestor of ours has an experience) that causes us to lock in a belief about ourselves or life. Because we lock in that belief, we create situations that prove it true over and over again. That’s right, YOU are the powerful creator of your own reality. Often, this beliefs slip into our subconscious mind as most of them happen during childhood or at conception or while we’re in the womb. (Yes, the things you think about and do while you’re pregnant matter GREATLY, as your child’s spirit is present from the time of conception). We then create our lives from these subconscious beliefs and can end up feeling like a victim of circumstance vs the powerful creator that we are.

As creators of our reality, we are the only ones able to change it. In my sessions of Holographic Kinetics, I see time and again how issues began and am so grateful that I am able to offer people a way to not only receive more clarity on why their lives are the way they are, but also to assist them to clear the issues and create a new reality.

We’re all under pressure right now to clear out all of the things we’ve been carrying around that no longer serve our highest good. That can look like spring cleaning the entire house in August, purging old stuff we don’t use, ending relationships, quitting the job we hate, and finding healing modalities that allow us to clear our biggest issues still holding us back.

This release of the old is key to moving into a more magnificent new than we can even imagine in this NOW moment. We’re shifting up, and what’s to come is WAY better than what we’ve experienced so far! Trust your journey.❤️