Confidence

I used to buy notebooks and journals all the time, and never write in them. Then, in about 2015, I started filling them and I haven’t stopped. The words just keep pouring out of me. During the times in my life when I lost my voice and gave my power away to other people and other things outside of myself, I withheld my creative expression. Now, it’s as if the floodgates have opened!

I remember times in my life when my energy overwhelmed the people I was closest to in my life. I remember times of having my words and actions questioned to the point of causing me to retreat deep inside of myself, because I felt “wrong” in every way I was trying to show up in the world. I remember the numerous times when people said I talked too much. You know, when you’re as sensitive as I am, you’re hearing people’s words and sensing what they’re thinking and feeling about you.

I am so happy that I have taken the time to get really confident in myself to the point of not caring if someone doesn’t like the way I’m showing up. I know that my energy attracts my tribe and I see how the people and situations in my life have shifted accordingly. I am happy that I have cultivated my communication over the years, because it’s extremely important for my purpose and the work I do. Communication is key to my favorite — connection. I’m so glad that through the course of my lifetime, I have taken classes, and have been in situations that required me to write a LOT. Again, all important for my purpose.

On May 31, 2018, after leaving my last shift as an RN in the hospital, I wrote: “I have chosen to follow my intuition, the synchronicities, and the urgings of my spirit and step onto a mostly invisible path. And I’ve never felt more at peace or more confident in my decisions as I do right now. I turn 39 tomorrow and fly around the world to a place I have dreamed of going since I was 18 — AUSTRALIA! It has taken me the better part of 39 years to get to this place. Today, I feel like I walked to the edge of a tall, spiring cliff, arms raised up like wings in the air, and jumped off into the great unknown with a confidence I didn’t have 3 years ago.”

Show up! Take risks! Live large!

I could have never seen the changes that would happen in my life from the ones I made back in 2018. My life looks nothing like I thought it would. I’m doing things for work now that didn’t even know existed back then! My personal sessions of Holographic Kinetics have only added to my confidence. One of the issues I cleared isn’t one I knew I had – feeling like there was something wrong with me. I had been carrying that around with me since my 20’s. It has been an experiment of sorts to clear issues like this one through Holographic Kinetics and then wait and see how it shifts my life. It’s hard to pinpoint the individual shifts and what issue’s release led to them, but I do know that I just feel so much more confident and comfortable in my own skin, and so much more trusting in my journey.

If you’re interested in having a Holographic Kinetics session with me, email me at peacefuljellyfish@gmail.com for more information. This week, I have openings on Thursday morning, Friday evening, and Saturday. I usually have availability on Tuesday and Thursday mornings and Saturday and Sunday. I schedule within the week we’re in. You can also visit http://www.holographickinetics.com for more information.

Thank you so much for reading. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG and FB for more inspiring content. Sending you all lots of love!

Jammie

My current song obsession can be heard HERE. It’s Nahko and Medicine for the People’s “Aloha Ke Akua”. And the even more fitting song, “Confidence” by Matisyahu HERE.

When you open my chest on the autopsy table…

When you open my chest on the autopsy table you will find the silver lining around my scarred heart marking the illness I overcame.

You will find a turquoise sea of love that I experienced throughout my lifetime.

Lust for places I traveled to and fell in love with, and all of the places that were always on my list for a future time.

You will find images of my son tucked away — saving them like photographs in an old static-cling photo album we always had when I was a kid.

You will find the joy that filled my days after the needle that removed the serosanguineous fluid from around my heart gave me a second chance at life — true, fully alive life.

You will find parts of every person I have connected with, every moment in nature I’ve spent, and every adventure I have ever had.

Body decaying, spirit gone on to the next life to live and love again through another suit with its own bones and flesh and organs.

A chest open with remnants remaining with the spark of my spirit on to the next time and place.

When you open my chest on the autopsy table, you won’t find me.

I am boundless and ever-evolving.

I’ll be back among the stars.

Energy swirling around the cosmos connecting back in with the Source that I AM.

When my body died, my spirit lept out and became everything that it always was — INFINITE.

I wrote this in a spoken word workshop I participated in this past weekend. We all had to include the same 5 words (I accidentally left one of them out) with the same opening line. We wrote for 10 minutes. This is what came of it. I hadn’t really thought about what I had written until I stood in front of the group to read it. Reading it out loud moved me to tears. It made me realize how even with everything I’ve been through, life is so very beautiful.

When I do leave this body, I want the people who love me to internalize this message. Read this at a party on the beach around a bonfire while people drum, dance, and celebrate! Toss my cremated remains into the sea and move on with gratitude for any moments you shared with me. We are far more than the meat suits we’re currently wearing. Life would not be so sweet without death. We are all infinite spiritual beings having a human experience.

Thank you for being here. If you enjoyed this post, please like and share it. Follow me on IG or FB for more inspiring content. Sending you all so much love!